You’re Threatened with Blackmail or Extortion: What to Do and How to Protect Yourself

Being threatened with blackmail or extortion is a terrifying experience. It’s more than just intimidation—it’s a crime. Whether someone is threatening to release private information, expose personal secrets, share embarrassing photos, or falsely accuse you of something unless you pay money or comply with demands, the fear and anxiety can be overwhelming.

You might feel trapped, ashamed, or unsure who to trust. But know this: you are not alone, and there are legal protections available. The worst thing you can do is stay silent or give in to demands without understanding your options.

This guide will help you understand what blackmail and extortion are, what steps to take immediately, and how to protect yourself legally, emotionally, and digitally.

What Is Blackmail or Extortion?

Legally, blackmail and extortion involve someone trying to obtain money, services, or favors from you through threats. The threat can be explicit (“Pay me or I’ll release this video”) or subtle (“It would be a shame if this got out”), but the intent is the same—coercion.

Common types of threats include:

• Releasing private photos, messages, or videos (including explicit content)
• Disclosing damaging information (real or fabricated)
• Accusing you publicly or to authorities of a crime you didn’t commit
• Harming your reputation, career, relationships, or business
• Threatening physical harm to you or someone you care about

Blackmail and extortion can happen in personal relationships, online, at work, or in business dealings—and they are crimes in every state.

Step 1: Do Not Pay or Comply with Demands

Your first instinct might be to give the blackmailer what they want, just to make the problem go away. But that rarely works—and often makes things worse.

Paying or complying:

• Does not guarantee the threat will stop
• May encourage further demands (they now know you’re afraid and willing to give in)
• Could compromise your legal standing
• Might open you up to ongoing manipulation or harassment

Instead, focus on documenting the threat and reporting it.

Step 2: Preserve All Evidence

Do not delete anything, even if it’s upsetting. You’ll need this information to build your case and protect yourself legally.

Save:

• Emails, texts, social media messages, or voicemails from the person making the threat
• Screenshots of any threats (make sure they include dates/timestamps)
• Contact info or user profiles of the person threatening you
• Any related conversations or interactions that establish the context
• Bank statements or records if money has already changed hands

Store everything securely, ideally in the cloud or on an external hard drive, and back it up.

Step 3: Do Not Engage Further

Once you’ve recognized the threat for what it is—a crime—cut off communication. Don’t try to negotiate, plead, or explain yourself.

Avoid:

• Arguing or threatening the blackmailer back
• Deleting your accounts (it may destroy evidence)
• Trying to "trick" the person or reverse the threat on your own

Let law enforcement or an attorney handle communications moving forward. You don’t need to face this person alone.

Step 4: Report It to the Authorities

Blackmail and extortion are serious crimes, and reporting them is the first step to protecting yourself and stopping the threat.

You can report the crime to:

• Your local police department
• The FBI’s Internet Crime Complaint Center (IC3) if the threat happened online or across state lines
• A cybercrime division, if your area has one

When filing a report, include all evidence and explain:

• How the person contacted you
• What they threatened to do
• What they demanded from you
• Any identifying details (phone number, username, photos, email, etc.)

Law enforcement can investigate, track the offender, and in some cases, press criminal charges. You may also be entitled to protective orders or injunctions.

Step 5: Consider Getting a Lawyer

While law enforcement can investigate the criminal aspect, a lawyer can help protect your civil rights and manage the legal fallout. They can:

• Advise you on how to safely respond (or not respond)
• Help report and preserve digital evidence properly
• Draft a cease-and-desist letter to the blackmailer if needed
• Assist with getting protective orders
• Represent you if the situation escalates into a civil or criminal case

Legal advice is especially important if the situation involves business disputes, high-profile reputations, or digital privacy violations.

Step 6: Take Digital Safety Precautions

In many cases of modern blackmail—especially online—the perpetrator has access to your personal content. Whether through hacking, social engineering, or prior relationships, you need to secure your digital life immediately.

Steps to take:

• Change passwords for all accounts (use unique, strong passwords)
• Enable two-factor authentication (2FA)
• Check devices for spyware or monitoring software
• Lock down your social media profiles (tighten privacy settings, remove public info)
• Alert friends or contacts to be cautious if the blackmailer tries to impersonate you

If you’ve shared photos, videos, or personal data that are now being used against you, keep copies—but don’t delete the originals until you’ve spoken to an attorney or police.

Step 7: Manage the Emotional Impact

Blackmail and extortion can cause intense anxiety, fear, shame, and even depression. It’s easy to feel isolated, but you are not to blame for someone else’s criminal behavior.

You don’t have to face this alone:

• Talk to a trusted friend, therapist, or counselor
• Reach out to support groups for victims of online abuse, harassment, or coercion
• Consider taking a short break from social media for mental health
• Remind yourself: this is a temporary crisis, and there are ways to resolve it

Taking care of your mental and emotional health is just as important as your legal protection.

Step 8: If the Threat Involves Intimate Images (Revenge Porn)

If someone threatens to release explicit images or videos, this may be classified as “revenge porn” or non-consensual image abuse, which is illegal in most states and many countries.

You may be able to:

• File criminal charges under state laws
• Request removal of content from websites and search engines
• Seek civil damages for emotional distress or reputational harm
• Obtain a restraining order

Acting quickly can help minimize the spread and ensure platforms remove content swiftly.

Final Thoughts

Being threatened with blackmail or extortion is scary, but you are not powerless. These acts are criminal for a reason—and the law is on your side. You deserve to feel safe, respected, and in control of your life.

By preserving evidence, reporting the crime, seeking legal support, and taking safety measures, you can protect yourself and take back your peace of mind. Most importantly: you don’t have to go through it alone.

Don’t Be Afraid To Get Help

If you’re facing legal questions, safety concerns, or emotional turmoil due to any of the situations described above—especially domestic abuse—don’t try to handle it alone. Professional guidance can make all the difference in ensuring your rights are protected and your next steps are clear. Whether you need legal advice, help with documentation, or assistance navigating local resources, speaking to an expert can bring peace of mind. Click here to get connected with professional support tailored to your situation.